Brainless, mindless things I've done

Yesterday I was skimming through Facebook when a friend's status update caught my eye:


That gave me a good laugh, but I was laughing with her, not at her, because that's only one of the absentminded things I've done. I tend to be, uh, forgetful in the best of circumstances, and when my mind is preoccupied or stressed, things can get pretty crazy. I'm not talking about minor incidents like leaving food out all night or leaving the car keys in the bathroom or laundering jeans with money or tissues still inside the pockets (tip: Do NOT do that. It clumps up and ruins all the other clothes in the same dryer load). I'm talking "What were you thinking??", "Why don't you lie down for a bit, you need a break" kind of stuff, like:

  • Pumped gas, left the gas nozzle inside my car's gas tank, and driven away.

  • Left papers up on the roof of my car, and driven away.

  • Left the milk up on the roof of my van (Not a car. A van. Don't even ask me why I would put it all the up there), and driven away.

  • Put the milk in the pantry (Miz B, you are not alone).

  • Put the cereal in the fridge.

  • Put the car keys in the fridge.

  • Forgotten to pick up The Pea from school.

  • Forgotten to take 3Po to soccer lessons (which is agony to me because there were no make-classes; such a waste of money!)

  • Forgotten that I had arranged a playdate with The Pea's friend (her dad dropped her off and I had no idea why she was there. I'm just glad we were there).

  • Thrown important papers in the recycling bin (Which is why, if you're in the neighborhood, you will occasionally see me foraging through our trash cans. Please don't call the police. I'm not a vagrant. I live there).

  • Thrown Alfie's stash of gourmet nuts and chocolates into the trash.

  • Left the stove on all night.

  • Flushed my car keys down the toilet. Don't ask.


I probably have more stories, but I've forgotten them!

2 comments:

Unknown said...

This is funny. I amlaughing with you too. When I am stressed or preoccupied I do the same things like: tell the kids to hang the jacket up in the trash, or put the shoes in the pantry. My kids think Im crazy. I go through all of their names my husband and the dogs before I say, "urgh. you know who I'm talking to!" Just recently I put the peanut butter in the fridge and the jelly in the pantry. One day I found a baby jar of food that the baby partially ate in the pantry instead od the fridge. Had to throw it out of course. Man, I feel crazy some days. =)

Tamara B. said...

I have put my cell phone on the pantry self while looking for something.