Now here's a hot topic that seems to be burning up the blogosphere lately: Pot-Smoking Moms (brought to my attention by the Ravin' Picture Maven, a fellow Maya's Mom participant). I try not to be a judgmental person, especially when it comes to parenting. I've had enough crazy moments of in my three-plus years of being a full-time parent not to appreciate how difficult it is, and I honestly think that many or most parents are really trying to do the right thing by their kids. And I think smoking pot -- just like smoking cigarettes or drinking alcohol or dancing at clubs all night -- does not necessarily make one a bad parent.
But in this case, we're not talking of moms who smoke pot when their kids are in bed; this is about moms who smoke pot with their kids. In "I'm a Better Mother when Stoned", Pot-Smoking Mom writes, "It turned out I could not only manage taking care of my son while I was high; I could excel." Oh dear -- that's definitely not bongga. I'm all for sipping martinis at my daughter's soccer game, but I think I'll draw the line at this.
Pot-Smoking Mom claims that getting stoned helps her relax, focus on her child, "get down to his level", appreciate things from his point of view, and rediscover the simple, here-and-now pleasures with him. All very well and good, but honey, someone still needs to be the parent. So who's the responsible adult while you're stoned? Who's going to set limits and ensure your child's safety? Yes, it's great to wander around the mall with your child, delighting at the baubles in the windows and throwing coins into the fountain, but who's to say you won't decide to jump into the fountain with your child in tow? Yes, it sucks being the fuddy-duddy, boring old parent, but someone's gotta do it.
Everyone wants to throw away their cares sometimes and be focused solely on their children. But surely there are other ways to achieve the same end? How about spending some time away from your kids? That'll relax you and recharge you for the next time your kid has a "Kid from Hell" moment. Hire a babysitter and get thee to a spa. Or watch a movie with your partner. Or shop (that's my favorite method). And if you can't afford it, lock yourself in the bathroom with a glass of wine and/or a box of chocolates. All perfectly legal and guaranteed not to endanger your child.
18 comments:
Oh AWESOME post. I agree: it might not sound as fun, but someone has to be the responsible parent.
Love the ideas for alternatives to finding one's zen in parenting.
So glad you posted on the topic!!
Julie
Ravin' Picture Maven
Great post and I fully agree with you. There are many perfectly legal and responsible ways to destress and to have fun with your kids, with no pot required!
I'm not a mom (yet) so I'm in even less a position to judge/offer my two cents, but I think you're right--if mom feels she needs to be high to deal with her kid(s), mom needs to find another outlet for whatever her real issue is. Perhaps therapy would be a good place to start.
Ok, well I guess none of you have ever smoked pot. No one is going to decide to jump into the fountain after smoking a bowl. But martinis at a soccer game would be alright??? Where is the logic? I live in CA and here if you have a note from a Doctor it is (state) legal to smoke marijuana. I would personally trust someone who was stoned more than I would trust someone drunk.
I know it's late in the game to reply to this but I just found this post when looking for something else. Don't worry about moms smoking pot. You CAN be a responsible parent when you've smoked pot. It's like drinking. One or two drinks. One or two hits. No one's talking about sucking down a whole bongload or downing a pint of tequila. Neither is good.
I find it funny that you recommend this mom to drink wine instead. Alcohol has far more devastating effects than marijuana. Get a life. BTW, the brainwashing worked well on you.
I have to agree with the last post. Would much rather have a stoner watch my kid than a drunk or some of these pill poppers.
Wow, lock yourself in the bathroom with wine!! haha what a joke, stay away from your kids? what the hell is wrong with you, maybe you were high when you wrote this because i think you got something twisted, and watching kids after twisting a joint is A oKay.
I really would like to know if you have ever smoked pot or not. I think it's actually kind of sad that you would suggest alcohol over marijuana. Why? Because it's legal? As a teen I drank alcohol and smoked pot occasionally. I got into more trouble and did so many things that I now regret while being under the influence of alcohol. Now that I'm an adult and a mother myself I prefer not drinking alcohol, I don't like the way it makes me feel. It blows my mind that you will sip martinis during your childs soccer game but criticize a mom who smokes pot occassionally, even regularly. Who is driving your kids home after the game?You could argue that you do it in moderation, so do pot smoking moms. What kind of research did you do before writing this blog? I think none, otherwise you probably wouldn't have suggested that the pot smoking mom would throw her and her child in the fountain at the mall. What an ignorant comment! You could also argue that it us illeagal, but not in some states. And even so, just because pot is illeagal doesn't make it more dangerous than alcohol, it's the other way around. I think if you need to lock yourself in the bathroom with a glass of wine or drink martinis during your childs soccer game than you might have a serious problem. I smoke pot when my child is asleep and even when she is awake, my husband would be around of course and I don't do it in front of her. But it's fun to be stoned and play with her. But even I ( bad pot smoking mom that I am) don't feel the need to self medicate at her sporting events. Btw if my daughter questioned me about smoking pot I would tell her the truth. I'd also warn her about the dangers of alcohol. I would much rather my child smoke pot than drink alcohol ANY DAY OF THE WEEK!
Ok this was an alright article until you said this *but who's to say you won't decide to jump into the fountain with your child in tow?*
You obviously have no clue what it is like to smoke pot...People don't smoke pot and jump in fountains at malls, that would be more of an alcohol induced scenario IMO. Pot is nothing like you have described it, what do you care if some one wants to get stoned once in a while and color with their kids, or play plato?
chill.... she must've never smoked. it doesnt make u CRAZY like most ppl think, it's not CRACK or PCP or acid or anything dangerous.. it has the effects on me like a nice relaxing bath... now I would love to actually take a bath, but I don't have a classy garden tub or any at all, just a stand up shower. I like to unwind and relax, not throw my kid into a fountain at the mall.. i think you'd have to be wasted on some SERIOUS narcotics to be able to do that... but i agree i would never drink alcohol if i had to drive, ANY AMOUNT!!! not everyone is going to take it the way you mean it (sipping on one drink for an hour wont impair your driving)
wow...you're kiddling me right? All of you super judgemental mothers out there who pop pills and get drunk on a regular basis, listen up: You don't know what in the eff you are talking about and most likely you feel bad about your own parenting skills or you wouldn't feel the need to post your little judgemental comments all over the internet that condemn mom's who smoke a little maryjane. Either that or you have no kids and are just up on your high horse becasue you're not happy unless you have something to bitch about. You don't know the first thing about weed. There are different levels of being stoned, much like there are different levels of being drunk. If you're mildy buzzed and around your kids...that's no big deal (unless you're just a fuck up to begin with). Do I think smoking pot around your kids is ok? No...but neither is slamming a beer. Use some common sense and set a good example for your kids. When they get to be adults, then you can share your appreciation of the green stuff with them...they'll be a lot less likely to rebel if mom is calm, cool, and collected...and uses some common sense. Argue with me if you want bitches, but you are wrong...there is only one reason why smoking pot is illegal and if you don't know what that is, you should google it.
OMG! You're ok with getting drunk at your kids soccar game but smoking a joint is wrong? I smoke and I'm a mom, I have never in all my years of smoking ever wanted to jump in a fountain or space out on...well..anything.Let me ask you something...did you drive your kid home after that soccar game? Do you do this often? How many DWI's have you had? Hundreds of thousands of people die everyday do to alcohol. Name me one time someone has died do to herb. You know you can't...because no one ever has.You have your drink...just have someone else drive your kid home.
"Yes, it's great to wander around the mall with your child, delighting at the baubles in the windows and throwing coins into the fountain, but who's to say you won't decide to jump into the fountain with your child in tow?"
Are you serious, lady? I just about fell off my chair laughing at that BS. That sounds like the behavior of someone on shrooms, not someone who smoked pot. LMAO. So many ignorant people out there...
I like to snort a couple of lines of Cocaine and drink three or four Gin and Tonics before I deal with my kids. I find it mellows me out. Dealing with children with an altered mind is always better than being sober. You can get down to their level that way.
Well, im a mother of a 7 month beautiful happy and healthy baby girl, I smoke pot and im a responsible, dedicated mom (from Ecuador) and just to make a point, it´s so obvious everyone would rather leave their babies with someone who smoked rather than drunk that those comments attacking marihuana smoking parents are funny to read. Alcohol better that weed? We dont ask you to stop being ignorant if you dont want to but at least be quiet.
Seriously. Smoking pot has never affected the discipline my child receives. And who the hell decided to jump in the fountain at the mall? Crazy people, not potheads. drunk people, not potheads. (At least, not the adult ones) Drinking is far worse, and coming from someone has done pretty much everything save for opiates or cocaine, pot is the absolute least harmful "drug" one could take. If I was drunk all the time, my kid would probably go to school with two slices of bread instead of sandwich, or I would trip over her, forget to change diapers, or drop the baby down the stairs. As it stands, I've never forgotten a feeding, a school lunch, a party, or a doctor's appointment. My kids are clean, well-behaved, and properly disciplined. Should we persecute moms for needing something to help them unwind? Everyone has their own way to do it; for some it's alcohol, cigarettes, music, baths, tea, or mood-altering prescription pills. In my (albeit biased) opinion, weed is not the worst way to do it. If you're the kind of idiot who smokes pot and jumps into public fountains, then it's not for you.
If you want to find "The BONGGA mom in you somewhere", perhaps you should inhale from the BONG...GA.
Post a Comment