Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Pardon the Dust!
If this blog looks a little funky over the next couple of days, I apologize in advance. I'm playing around with templates, widgets, and all that fun stuff. Hopefully I'll end up with a layout that's fresh, fun and fabulous!
Morbid thoughts on a rainy day
When you're snuggled up under the covers on a cold, rainy day, and the kids are all downstairs having breakfast with daddy, the last thing you want to do with your 30 minutes of peace is to be thinking about death. But I was watching Bonnie Erbe's To The Contrary on PBS, and the topic was Asian-American women and retirement.
I always knew that women live longer than men in general, and that Asians have relatively long lifespans, but I guess I never really put the two together -- Asian American women's lifespan is about 86 years, 5 years longer than for white females, and almost 10 years longer than for African Americans. Nor have I really thought about out how I'm going to afford all those extra years of life (apparently 28% of retired Asian Americans rely solely on Social Security for income).
The segment was a good wake-up call because at the rate I'm going, my retirement savings will be firmly entrenched in the 5-digits for years to come. Not that Alfie is in a much better position -- both of our 401k accounts have been decimated by the stock market crash, money has been tight and his 401k contribution is only enough to match whatever his company gives as a benefit. But still, every little bit helps. Alfie has his 401k contributions, we put away a little bit each month for the kids' college funds -- but what about me? What's a stay-at-home mom to do? I know about spousal IRA's, but are there any other options? Hey Bonnie, there's a topic for your next show......
I always knew that women live longer than men in general, and that Asians have relatively long lifespans, but I guess I never really put the two together -- Asian American women's lifespan is about 86 years, 5 years longer than for white females, and almost 10 years longer than for African Americans. Nor have I really thought about out how I'm going to afford all those extra years of life (apparently 28% of retired Asian Americans rely solely on Social Security for income).
The segment was a good wake-up call because at the rate I'm going, my retirement savings will be firmly entrenched in the 5-digits for years to come. Not that Alfie is in a much better position -- both of our 401k accounts have been decimated by the stock market crash, money has been tight and his 401k contribution is only enough to match whatever his company gives as a benefit. But still, every little bit helps. Alfie has his 401k contributions, we put away a little bit each month for the kids' college funds -- but what about me? What's a stay-at-home mom to do? I know about spousal IRA's, but are there any other options? Hey Bonnie, there's a topic for your next show......
Ready? (no) Set? (no) Well, go anyway!
This Nike Women's Marathon in October is shaping up to be one sweet run. No ordinary water cups, bananas and energy bars every couple of miles for this race, oh no. We're getting an Oxygen Bar! Chocolate station! Jamba Juice station! Pedicare Station! Finisher's Necklace from Tiffany's! No wonder the race sold out so quickly.
There's just one problem: I'm not ready. Working my way up to a ten-mile run -- a 6-mile run plus one mile walk plus three-mile run, actually -- was so painful, I lost one of my toenails (and another is barely hanging on by a toenail, pun definitely intended). New running shoes seems to have helped, but now I'm back to six or seven miles again. With five weeks to go.
I should probably be running the 13.1 miles in my sleep by now. What the heck. Wish me luck. I've got a lot of running to do in order to deserve that Tiffany's necklace and pedicure.
Finding the "Me" in "Mom"
Many people have told me, "You are so calm for a mom with 3 kids!" or "You are such an easygoing mom". I think they're mostly being nice, or they feel sorry for me and can see that I need an infusion of positive reinforcement. But compared with myself two or three years ago, I think they're right. I am a calmer parent. And a happier and more involved one. And it's directly correlated with the increasing amounts of "Me" time that I've been able to carve out for myself.
Having twins is a wonderful blessing, but there is no denying that it is difficult, difficult, difficult, especially in their first year. Seriously, there's always at least one baby crying or feeding or pooping every hour of the day. I was breastfeeding twins and caring for a toddler by myself. My daughter's preschool hours left me some time with "just" the two babies, but I didn't think we could afford any other outside help. I was exhausted, miserable, and almost resentful of my situation.
The only time I had to myself was at night, after all the kids went to bed. I would escape to any store that closed at 9:30 (Michael's, ToysRUs, Cost Plus World Markets) or 10PM (Target, Walmart) and just wander around. When the stores closed, I would return home and surf the internet for hours. My husband could not understand it -- Get some sleep! he would say. How could I explain that after a long day of caring for everyone else's needs but my own, I had this desperate desire for a looong stretch of time by myself, for myself?
Finally, my husband put his foot down and hired a housekeeper to come twice a month. That single act made a huge difference in my outlook and began the process of finding the "Me" in "Mom". With each step I felt more like a person. After breastfeeding stopped, I was able to leave the kids with my husband for longer hours. I joined a gym with childcare. Next came an occasional babysitter. Then last September the boys started preschool two days a week. Six hours of time by myself per week! Me time!
Note that I said Me time, not free time. Those six hours are easily eaten away by tasks done better without kids in tow, such as laundry, cooking or light cleaning, or volunteering at school, or errands like grocery shopping or running to the bank. But it's time alone. And I do manage to set aside some of those six hours to do things I enjoy. Like blogging. Or window shopping. Or having lunch at a cafe and sitting quietly in the sun.
The boys are starting a new preschool in September, and today is their last day at their old preschool. That means it's going to be my last "Me" day for several months. Good-bye to those precious six hours (and I've already spent one of those hours writing this post!). I guess it's back to late-night visits to Target again.
But you know what? That's ok. The kids are a bit older now, and require less attention. I'm really looking forward to spending time with the boys at the park and at the Mommy-and-me classes we'll be taking. I have lots of ideas for projects we can do together at home. I've surfed the internet and filled our calendar with events and outings all over the Bay Area. I'm not going back to being miserable and desperate. All that "Me" time I've taken is paying off -- it's making me a better Mom.
Having twins is a wonderful blessing, but there is no denying that it is difficult, difficult, difficult, especially in their first year. Seriously, there's always at least one baby crying or feeding or pooping every hour of the day. I was breastfeeding twins and caring for a toddler by myself. My daughter's preschool hours left me some time with "just" the two babies, but I didn't think we could afford any other outside help. I was exhausted, miserable, and almost resentful of my situation.
The only time I had to myself was at night, after all the kids went to bed. I would escape to any store that closed at 9:30 (Michael's, ToysRUs, Cost Plus World Markets) or 10PM (Target, Walmart) and just wander around. When the stores closed, I would return home and surf the internet for hours. My husband could not understand it -- Get some sleep! he would say. How could I explain that after a long day of caring for everyone else's needs but my own, I had this desperate desire for a looong stretch of time by myself, for myself?
Finally, my husband put his foot down and hired a housekeeper to come twice a month. That single act made a huge difference in my outlook and began the process of finding the "Me" in "Mom". With each step I felt more like a person. After breastfeeding stopped, I was able to leave the kids with my husband for longer hours. I joined a gym with childcare. Next came an occasional babysitter. Then last September the boys started preschool two days a week. Six hours of time by myself per week! Me time!
Note that I said Me time, not free time. Those six hours are easily eaten away by tasks done better without kids in tow, such as laundry, cooking or light cleaning, or volunteering at school, or errands like grocery shopping or running to the bank. But it's time alone. And I do manage to set aside some of those six hours to do things I enjoy. Like blogging. Or window shopping. Or having lunch at a cafe and sitting quietly in the sun.
The boys are starting a new preschool in September, and today is their last day at their old preschool. That means it's going to be my last "Me" day for several months. Good-bye to those precious six hours (and I've already spent one of those hours writing this post!). I guess it's back to late-night visits to Target again.
But you know what? That's ok. The kids are a bit older now, and require less attention. I'm really looking forward to spending time with the boys at the park and at the Mommy-and-me classes we'll be taking. I have lots of ideas for projects we can do together at home. I've surfed the internet and filled our calendar with events and outings all over the Bay Area. I'm not going back to being miserable and desperate. All that "Me" time I've taken is paying off -- it's making me a better Mom.
Is Disneyland REALLY the Happiest Place on Earth?
There are dream journeys, and then there are Dream Journeys. My top-of-the-line Dream Journey would involve a white-sand-beach, preferably isolated, or a trip to an old-world city, rich in culture and sophisticated chic. My kids would all be perfectly behaved, or cared for by nannies, or older, or not included. We would travel in the lap of luxury and be there for at least two weeks.
My short-term dream journey is a bit simpler and perhaps more attainable. I just want to take my children to Disneyland. I first visited Disneyland when I was seven, and it was truly magical. I have been there three times since, as well as Disneyworld once, and each time have left wanting to go back. Now that I have children, I want to go even more. I want to see the joy and wonder in their faces as their favorite storybook characters come alive. Graham wonders at the intensity of my desire; he has never been to Disneyland, so I cannot really explain to him how different it is from the parks he has been to: Great America, Marine World or even Legoland.
My short-term dream journey is a bit simpler and perhaps more attainable. I just want to take my children to Disneyland. I first visited Disneyland when I was seven, and it was truly magical. I have been there three times since, as well as Disneyworld once, and each time have left wanting to go back. Now that I have children, I want to go even more. I want to see the joy and wonder in their faces as their favorite storybook characters come alive. Graham wonders at the intensity of my desire; he has never been to Disneyland, so I cannot really explain to him how different it is from the parks he has been to: Great America, Marine World or even Legoland.
Sign up for Natalie's Tell-A-Tthon!
Once Natalie entered kindergarten I knew it would only be a matter of time before I came knocking on people's doors with requests for money or something to sell. From my own schooldays and my experiences from the BC (Before Children) era, it seems fundraising is a part of both public and private school life. I have bought many a Sees' or M&M's candy bar from a co-worker, friend or cousin raising funds for her daughter or son's school. Our neighbor's children knock on our door once or twice a year, without fail, to sell us giftwrap or magazine subscriptions or Girl Scout cookies. Natalie's school has alreay held giftwrap sales and booksales and auctions and pledge drives.
We fully support our schools and understand that, for our kids' sakes, volunteerism and donations are necessary to supplement the paltry stipends given to them by the government. So we do try to help out in various ways, volunteering time and goods and money. We've attended and supported the various fundraisers, but so far I haven't asked anyone else to buy something in support of Natalie's school. Forgive me, but that's about to change.
Natalie's kindergarten class is holding a Kindergarten Tell-A-Thon to raise money for the Family Center at Palo Alto's Opportunity Center, an organization helping homeless and impoverished families. For the Tell-A-Thon, she and her classmates will be learning the answers to the following:
1) Name
2) Mother's name
3) Father's name
4) Birthday (dd/mm/yy)
5) Street address
6) City
7) Zip code
8) State
9) Country
10) Home phone number
11) Bonus question: What are the three colors in the USA flag?
She'll be reciting the above facts to her teachers on Thursday, March 8th. Family and friends can sponsor her for every fact she remembers. For everything on the list that Natalie answers correctly, you can donate 15 cents, for a total of just $1.50 per sponsor. What is $1.50 worth? Not even a tall Starbucks latte ($3). Here's what you can get for $1.50 these days:
A bottle of Diet Coke.
530 calories (from a Taco Bell Beef-and-Potato burrito).
2 packs of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups (with 2 pieces each).
I don't feel so bad asking family and friends to give up that Taco Bell burrito. For our English relatives, with the US-GBP exchange rate solidly in their favor, it's even better, only 77p. That 77p buys you:
1 song download from 7Digital.
200g bottle of Johnsons' Baby Powder from ASDA.
2 cups of Weight Watchers Chocolate Mousse.
It's just a small fundraiser but it's the one I wanted to speak out for. Why? Well, it's for a good cause, of course. But I also like the fact that Natalie has to make a little bit of an effort to raise the money. And I like the fact that the fundraiser benefits her as well -- it's a great way to encourage her to learn these important pieces of information, which instills confidence in herself and helps keep her safe. Last but not least, I think it's a great way to get her started on a lifetime habit of helping others in her community.
So friends and family, if you are willing to give up your Starbucks fix for just half a day (or whatever your $.150 buys you) in support of Natalie's fundraiser, please let me know! Send me an email or leave a comment on this post.
We fully support our schools and understand that, for our kids' sakes, volunteerism and donations are necessary to supplement the paltry stipends given to them by the government. So we do try to help out in various ways, volunteering time and goods and money. We've attended and supported the various fundraisers, but so far I haven't asked anyone else to buy something in support of Natalie's school. Forgive me, but that's about to change.
Natalie's kindergarten class is holding a Kindergarten Tell-A-Thon to raise money for the Family Center at Palo Alto's Opportunity Center, an organization helping homeless and impoverished families. For the Tell-A-Thon, she and her classmates will be learning the answers to the following:
1) Name
2) Mother's name
3) Father's name
4) Birthday (dd/mm/yy)
5) Street address
6) City
7) Zip code
8) State
9) Country
10) Home phone number
11) Bonus question: What are the three colors in the USA flag?
She'll be reciting the above facts to her teachers on Thursday, March 8th. Family and friends can sponsor her for every fact she remembers. For everything on the list that Natalie answers correctly, you can donate 15 cents, for a total of just $1.50 per sponsor. What is $1.50 worth? Not even a tall Starbucks latte ($3). Here's what you can get for $1.50 these days:
A bottle of Diet Coke.
530 calories (from a Taco Bell Beef-and-Potato burrito).
2 packs of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups (with 2 pieces each).
I don't feel so bad asking family and friends to give up that Taco Bell burrito. For our English relatives, with the US-GBP exchange rate solidly in their favor, it's even better, only 77p. That 77p buys you:
1 song download from 7Digital.
200g bottle of Johnsons' Baby Powder from ASDA.
2 cups of Weight Watchers Chocolate Mousse.
It's just a small fundraiser but it's the one I wanted to speak out for. Why? Well, it's for a good cause, of course. But I also like the fact that Natalie has to make a little bit of an effort to raise the money. And I like the fact that the fundraiser benefits her as well -- it's a great way to encourage her to learn these important pieces of information, which instills confidence in herself and helps keep her safe. Last but not least, I think it's a great way to get her started on a lifetime habit of helping others in her community.
So friends and family, if you are willing to give up your Starbucks fix for just half a day (or whatever your $.150 buys you) in support of Natalie's fundraiser, please let me know! Send me an email or leave a comment on this post.
Weight update: I've lost 5 lbs.!
Wow, that was easy! Then again, the first 5 lbs. always is. Especially since it's probably just water weight that I lost. And since my bloaty-time of the month has just ended. And since I had that 12-hour fast before last week's nuclear thyroid scan. I'll probably gain 2 or 3 lbs. back in the next couple of days.
Still, it's best to focus on the positive. I've made some changes in my habits already. I'm done with the holiday sweets. I'm making an effort to eat fruit between meals, and drink more water. I'm giving myself leeway to have some goodies once a week, so I don't feel deprived. And next week I'm going back to the gym after 3 weeks away. Next on my agenda: curbing portion sizes. Stay tuned for my progess!
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