One of the few household chores that Alfie does not offer to help me with is cooking dinner. I don't mind; I like cooking and he doesn't. Besides, he usually gets home too late to cook. But there are times when I do ask for help with dinner, and he steps up to the plate magnificently. There are only 3 things that Alfie cooks.......
Grilled food: Hamburgers, hotdogs, sausages or grilled chicken. For some reason, any time we decide to get the grill out and have a barbie, Alfie takes charge. He says it's a Man Thing. I don't mind. I let him do it because he does such a great job of cleaning the grill afterwards.
Heinz baked beans with fried eggs and toast. He never lets me fry eggs for him because I can't get the hang of flipping the egg with a runny yolk. (I refuse to cook eggs sunny-side up because all can see when I look at it are the millions of salmonella partying in that runny yolk).
Pasta with tomatoes, onions, garlic and canned tunas sauteed in olive oil. He insists on the fresh garlic and tomatoes, so the final result is simple but deeeeevine.
..... and I must admit, he does all 3 so well that I don't even offer to help.
Photo Hunt: Ruin(ed)
We tried out our new Creativity for Kids Pottery Studio yesterday; here is Jammy's work of art. It was supposed to be a teacup, but somewhere along the way the edges grew lopsided and the sides fell flat. Ruined? Not according to him. He set to work embellishing it and turned it into a plate. I guess it will look better once it's painted. But to him -- and to me -- it looks pretty good just the way it is.
For more ruins, click here.
And one more thing: Come and stop by my review blog, Bonggamom Finds! I'm giving away fun toys all month long, including a Russ Seapals stuffed toy, I-Dog Clip toy, and more!
Second looks, second chances
From afar, it's just an ugly old wall of ivy. You have to get up close to see the hearts. See? Sometimes you can't rely on your first impression; you have to give things a chance.
For more images of love, click here.
Am I a White Trash Mom?
Recently I read the White Trash Mom Handbook, a witty, feel-good, perspective on motherhood written along the lines of Erma Bombeck. Even before I finished chapter one, I could see that the book rails against the unrealistic standards of perfection for moms.
But.... but.....I'm a Type A personality. I like to set the bar high. In fact, that's why I named my blog Finding Bonggamom -- because I'm looking for that bit of Bette Midler, Nicole Kidman and Martha Stewart that exists in all moms. Does that mean I'm striving to be..... gasp! -- a Muffia? A mean, snobby sanctimommy who looks down at people who don't meet some unrealistic standard of perfection?
No, no, no! I had to take the White Trash Mom Quiz in chapter 2. As I suspected, like so many other moms who follow the author's blog, I can totally relate to being a White Trash Mom. For example:
* My kids do think Velveeta is cheese -- along with Cheez Whiz and cheese in a can.
* My kids read People magainze more than oce a year.
* I feign ignorance when my husband points out rips in my jeans (even though I first noticed them two years ago). Ditto on stains.
* I sent the Pea to school without lunch twice in a single week.
* I've forgotten to pick up my kid from school several times (and I'm frequently the last mom there)
And to my delight, on page 21 I found: "WT Moms still hold on to a flicker of that light they had before they had kids. They can still laugh about some of the same things, still remember who they were before they were mothers........ you can't let the kids take over your life and personality".
That is exactly what being a Bongga Mom is about! It's not about being the perfect Martha Stewart, it's about having her creativity and her fighting spirit. It's about being a mom, but keeping that glam, fab, spark -- the outrageousness of Bette Midler, the elegance of Nicole Kidman -- in you.
Yes, I want to be a Bongga Mom, but I'm happy and proud to be a White Trash Mom. Yes, I do wish my house looked like a Real Simple magazine feature spread. And every day you'll find me on my hands and knees picking up crud from the kitchen floor (before my son eats it first), trying to get it that way. But I know it never will, because I have 3 lovable kids who mess up the floor as fast as I can clean it, and I'm not going to beat myself up about it.
So.... are you a White Trash Mom too?
Written by a fellow SV Mom, Michelle Lamar, The White Trash Mom Handbook reminds us all that perfection is a myth and moms everywhere should go a bit easier on themselves. For more info on the White Trash Mom, head on over to the SV Moms Book Club discussion, or read my review over at Bonggamom Finds.
I want to get off the Straight Talk Express when it stops at the Sex Ed station
The other night, Jammy turned to me, pointed to his testicles (I was giving him a shower) and said, "Mama, I don't understand what this part of my winky is for. What does it do and what's inside it?"
Oooooookaaaaay....... let's run through all the possible things I could have said:
1) Well, that's called a scrotum. It holds your testicles.
If I say this, I'll need to answer all the inevitable follow-up questions ("What are testicles? What is sperm? etc.. etc...). I wasn't quite ready to follow the Straight Talk Express to its (pardon the pun) sticky conclusion, especially to a 4-year-old boy.
2) Ask your daddy, he's a boy like you so he knows.
If I say this, I'll look stupid and he'll think mama doesn't know anything. No thank you.
3) You don't worry about that, you'll find out when you're old enough.
It's a bit like Sarah Palin hiding from the press, isn't it? How easy it would be to just refuse to take questions -- but I'm not Sarah Palin and I couldn't do it. We've always been pretty open about our bodies and I'm happy that my kids are comfortable enough to ask me any kind of question. No, it's too much of a copout -- I have to give some kind of answer.
4) I don't really know, let's get on the internet and find out.
It's also tempting to say this, because I figure but it makes it less easier for me if I read someone else's words to the kids. Of course, it's still a cop-out (or a delaying tactic, at best).
In the end, I blurted out a combination of #1 and #4: "Those are your testicles, honey, and you know how your veins hold blood? Well, your testicles hold some kind of liquid that makes boys boys. Hmmm, I'm not really doing a good job of explaining it, am I? So let's go borrow a book about the body from the library and we'll look this up."
Boy, am I a loooooser. An incomprehensible answer and a delaying tactic (because of course, after the shower, Jammy forgot all about it). I need to get better at answering these kinds of questions because they're coming at me faster and faster. I don't have any experience in parent-child sex talk (as a parent and as a child) but I do know that I want to answer their questions honestly, in an age-appropriate manner. I'm bookmarking this post because I love the way Sarah E. answered her sons' questions -- direct, brief, humorous, in a way they could understand. Sarah, I might have to quote you directly the next time my kids ask me about this stuff.
Oooooookaaaaay....... let's run through all the possible things I could have said:
1) Well, that's called a scrotum. It holds your testicles.
If I say this, I'll need to answer all the inevitable follow-up questions ("What are testicles? What is sperm? etc.. etc...). I wasn't quite ready to follow the Straight Talk Express to its (pardon the pun) sticky conclusion, especially to a 4-year-old boy.
2) Ask your daddy, he's a boy like you so he knows.
If I say this, I'll look stupid and he'll think mama doesn't know anything. No thank you.
3) You don't worry about that, you'll find out when you're old enough.
It's a bit like Sarah Palin hiding from the press, isn't it? How easy it would be to just refuse to take questions -- but I'm not Sarah Palin and I couldn't do it. We've always been pretty open about our bodies and I'm happy that my kids are comfortable enough to ask me any kind of question. No, it's too much of a copout -- I have to give some kind of answer.
4) I don't really know, let's get on the internet and find out.
It's also tempting to say this, because I figure but it makes it less easier for me if I read someone else's words to the kids. Of course, it's still a cop-out (or a delaying tactic, at best).
In the end, I blurted out a combination of #1 and #4: "Those are your testicles, honey, and you know how your veins hold blood? Well, your testicles hold some kind of liquid that makes boys boys. Hmmm, I'm not really doing a good job of explaining it, am I? So let's go borrow a book about the body from the library and we'll look this up."
Boy, am I a loooooser. An incomprehensible answer and a delaying tactic (because of course, after the shower, Jammy forgot all about it). I need to get better at answering these kinds of questions because they're coming at me faster and faster. I don't have any experience in parent-child sex talk (as a parent and as a child) but I do know that I want to answer their questions honestly, in an age-appropriate manner. I'm bookmarking this post because I love the way Sarah E. answered her sons' questions -- direct, brief, humorous, in a way they could understand. Sarah, I might have to quote you directly the next time my kids ask me about this stuff.
Celebrating Bella
Bella was one of 3Po and Jammy's very first friends. They first met when they were about 15 months old, at childcare, when 3Po bit Bella's arm. Fortunately, Bella's mom, the Divine Miss B, is the wisest of women. Instead of huffily carting her child away from my son's sharp teeth, she laughed it off and figured that either 3Po would grow out of it or Bella would learn to defend herself. She was right. The biting stopped, and a friendship -- between kids and moms -- started.
Even though Miss B moved to Texas a couple of years ago, she is still a kindred spirit and I still count her as a good friend. She never ceases to amaze me. She's a lawyer, wife, volunteer, long-distance walker and homeschooling mother to three girls under six. Now she's adding author to her long list of accomplishments. Scheduled for publication sometime in 2009, Celebrating Bella , is intended to be a resource for parents struggling to understand and help a child with autism spectrum disorders. That is so like Miss B; in chronicling her own experiences with Bella, she has come up with a way to help other parents avoid having to go through what she did. You go, girl.
Miss B is currently in the midst of research for the book and would love to hear from people with personal experiences with autism spectrum disorders: as a parent, teacher or young adult dealing with these issues. If you are interested in sharing your experiences, please head over to her website, Celebrating Bella, and fill out a brief questionnaire.
Even though Miss B moved to Texas a couple of years ago, she is still a kindred spirit and I still count her as a good friend. She never ceases to amaze me. She's a lawyer, wife, volunteer, long-distance walker and homeschooling mother to three girls under six. Now she's adding author to her long list of accomplishments. Scheduled for publication sometime in 2009, Celebrating Bella , is intended to be a resource for parents struggling to understand and help a child with autism spectrum disorders. That is so like Miss B; in chronicling her own experiences with Bella, she has come up with a way to help other parents avoid having to go through what she did. You go, girl.
Miss B is currently in the midst of research for the book and would love to hear from people with personal experiences with autism spectrum disorders: as a parent, teacher or young adult dealing with these issues. If you are interested in sharing your experiences, please head over to her website, Celebrating Bella, and fill out a brief questionnaire.
Now playing in the kitchen, Nov. 9 episode
This week for dinner, I'm featuring two well-loved English dishes, fish and chips and sausages and beans. Let me regroup those: (fish and chips) and (sausages and beans). Actually, you could eat all those things together but I prefer to spread the cholesterol and great taste over two days instead of one.
* Fish and chips
We are big fans of fish and chips. Alfie and I have searched all over London for good fish and chips, but other than one divine place at St. Katharine's Docks (which we can't remember the name of), we've concluded that the art of fish-and-chipping is slowly dying (Although the Harry Ramsden's takeaway is pretty decent). The best fish and chips in the world is actually right here in California, at Barbara's Fish Trap in Princeton-by-the-Sea. The stuff I make at home is nothing like genuine F&C (we don't have a deep fryer, so there is no way I'm going to get anything close to Barbara's), but we like to pretend we're eating the real thing.
* French bread pizza with caramelized onions, mushrooms and goat cheese
* Sausages and beans
* Beef with broccoli and rice
* Fish and chips
We are big fans of fish and chips. Alfie and I have searched all over London for good fish and chips, but other than one divine place at St. Katharine's Docks (which we can't remember the name of), we've concluded that the art of fish-and-chipping is slowly dying (Although the Harry Ramsden's takeaway is pretty decent). The best fish and chips in the world is actually right here in California, at Barbara's Fish Trap in Princeton-by-the-Sea. The stuff I make at home is nothing like genuine F&C (we don't have a deep fryer, so there is no way I'm going to get anything close to Barbara's), but we like to pretend we're eating the real thing.
* French bread pizza with caramelized onions, mushrooms and goat cheese
* Sausages and beans
* Beef with broccoli and rice
How 7-year olds make money
The Pea and her classmates have been brainstorming on ways to raise funds to buy food and supplies for a class party, and their teacher is incorporating the process into their Social Studies unit on markets, producers, consumers and services. The goal is for each child to raise at least $5.00 by providing some sort of service to their parents. Here is what The Pea came up with:
1) Clean up after my brothers (Cost: $2 per mess).
2) Read to my brothers (Cost: $0.50 per book).
3) Brush my hair with the bad brush (Cost: $0.80)
4) Make really cool crafts for you (Cost: $1.00 per craft).
5) Make things for the poor (Cost: $0.10 per 10 crafts).
Yup, that's my little Warren Buffet.
1) Clean up after my brothers (Cost: $2 per mess).
2) Read to my brothers (Cost: $0.50 per book).
3) Brush my hair with the bad brush (Cost: $0.80)
4) Make really cool crafts for you (Cost: $1.00 per craft).
5) Make things for the poor (Cost: $0.10 per 10 crafts).
Yup, that's my little Warren Buffet.
Photo Hunt: Together
I like it when we bike to the park together. I like it when the kids splash through puddles. I even like it when Alfie finds a gigantic puddle and decides to lead the kids in a round of "bike through the puddle and see who makes the biggest splash". But at that point, the togetherness ends. I'm quite happy to watch -- and quite happy that I didn't have to bike home with my clothes absolutely soaked.
By the way, I think the honor of "biggest splash" might have to go to Jammy. Or maybe 3Po. Both fell off their bikes straight into the water.
For more togetherness, click here.
Alien love
I couldn't resist posting this little Halloween flashback for Love Thursday. When Jammy and 3Po trick-or-treated around Santana Row , they got a bick kick out of holding each other's tentacles (probably the only time they've willingly held hands). And don't you think those big yellow symbols on their chests look sort of like hearts?
For more images of love, click here.
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