What's for dinner, Alfie?

One of the few household chores that Alfie does not offer to help me with is cooking dinner. I don't mind; I like cooking and he doesn't. Besides, he usually gets home too late to cook. But there are times when I do ask for help with dinner, and he steps up to the plate magnificently. There are only 3 things that Alfie cooks.......

Grilled food: Hamburgers, hotdogs, sausages or grilled chicken. For some reason, any time we decide to get the grill out and have a barbie, Alfie takes charge. He says it's a Man Thing. I don't mind. I let him do it because he does such a great job of cleaning the grill afterwards.

Heinz baked beans with fried eggs and toast. He never lets me fry eggs for him because I can't get the hang of flipping the egg with a runny yolk. (I refuse to cook eggs sunny-side up because all can see when I look at it are the millions of salmonella partying in that runny yolk).

Pasta with tomatoes, onions, garlic and canned tunas sauteed in olive oil. He insists on the fresh garlic and tomatoes, so the final result is simple but deeeeevine.

..... and I must admit, he does all 3 so well that I don't even offer to help.